True story. Thanks for reading and supporting our little publication.
The mega talented Wizard Jennilee illustrated an adorable colour cover for this special issue - but don’t worry - we put a version of it on the back page for you to colour - we know colouring relaxes you.
INSIDE THE MARCH ISSUE: Round up the kids - we are extending our Family Friendly hours on March 15 11am-8pm for our annual MARCH BREAK PINBALL PARTY FOR KIDS - read all about it. Curtis has another weird Adventures of TARG comic for yaz - he has come through with side splitting, head scratching funnies for every issue since #1 - thanks for being the most prolific TARG Zine contributor Curtis! MONTY leads the human resistance against SkyNet with his Pinball Master Class lesson for Terminator 2. THE HALL OF WIZARDS leaderboard has been updated with the top 10 ballers of 2017… so far. You can join this esteemed group by participating in our Monthly Free Pinball Tournaments - news about the next one in TARG Zine. ARCADE UPDATE gives you a glimpse into the future - we will have some new games on location this month plus a rad new upgrade to our SUPER CHEXX Bubble Hockey game - too cool to mention here. Read “A Music Nerd’s Guide to Ottawa Juno Award Heroes” & impress/bore you friends with your newfound knowledge. The Bionic Woman, Alien & George the Animal Steele (R.I.P.) all make an appearance in the TOYS R JOSH comic strip. There are a few new faces in the Perogi Kitchen - meet DAVEY the March Wizard of The Month, SLO’ TOM answers a dating question, a guitar amplifier question and recounts a truly bizarre animal attack story in this months advice column. SKA JEFF’s Hi FIVES will get you primed for the 2 90’s PUNK COVER NITES happening this month. We have a wonderful update about our 1st CLOTHING SWAP last month… the community participation was phenomenal. Thanks for giving Ottawa. One of TARG’s favourite "musicians, B.A. Johnston just released his 11th studio album, Gremlins 3 - we asked him some questions about his highly unusual music video for “DRIVE THRU BEEF” a song about the perils of Fast Food Dinning. Professor BERNIE gives you the straight goods on Super PAC-MAN in his Video Game Super-guide. Petr Maur captures the goofy side of heavy sludge masters SWARM OF SPHERES in this months TARG Pin-Up and finally everything you need to know about all the fun shows coming your way in March can be found in YOGI’S PEROGRAM. Grab yer copy at the arcade or...
WE ARE NOT WORTHY! ISSUE #35 OF TARG ZINE NOW AVAILABLE.
The cult comedy classic WAYNE’s WORLD turns 25 this month. GM BG (great movie, bad game).
INSIDE THE FEBRUARY ISSUE OF TARG ZINE:
Got a big heart but a tiny bank account? No problem - we have 4 arcade themed valentines cards that you can clip out and give to your “lucky” loved ones. "The Adventures of TARG” is the longest running feature in TARG ZINE, it has appeared ever since issue ONE and CURTIS has supplied us with yet another rib tickler. Learn how to rip it up on SKATEBALL pinball in MONTY’S MASTER CLASS. Did you know we have a fun PUNK PINBALL LEAGUE Showdown every month? It’s free to get in on the action + TARG ZINE keeps tabs on the action of your progress in the HALL OF WIZARDS LEADERBOARD. Family Day is coming up and Old Ottawa South has some fun scenes for wicked holiday hangs - read all about it! WIZARD JOSH digs deep into his treasure chest of action figures for some wild comic book drama involving Jason, Freddy, Skeletor & Yoda—WHAAAAT? THE GRINDMOTHER is coming to TARG in March - Learn everything you need to know about the Worlds oldest and coolest extreme metal vocalist. SLO TOM gets into some hot water with alternative facts regarding omelettes - too arduous to get into with this summary - so read it for yourself. A little known fact - House of TARG also has a license to operate as cruise ship - and on VALENTINES DAY you can get your romantic sea legs straight at REMI ROYALE’S LOVE BOAT: Valentines Voyage - again too hard & unusual to explain here. Ever wonder what you have to do about reducing your carbon footprint? Just peel the pages of TARG ZINE to get info about THE TARG CLOTHING SWAP - We can’t believe this hasn’t happened already! By now, everyone knows that SKA JEFF was raised by a Commodore 64 home computer - so no surprise that he gives us a very Hi Fives of his fave WRASTLIN’ video games, Don’t count BERNARD out - he’s got some serious tips about a mega classic in his VIDEO GAME SUPER GUIDE. The mega talented Elixir Wizard Jennilee gives you a thoughtful Perogi image to colour with crayons (available at the arcade) - peace guaranteed. We keep asking master SHUTTERBUG Petr Maur to take pics of wicked Ottawa bands for the monthly TARG PIN-UP - and thankfully he keeps saying yes... check out his glorious photo Thünderkok - the band with the best pants! And finally, The real reason you are excited about TARG ZINE - YOGI’S PEROGRAM - everything you need to know about everything that is going down for February.
THE TARG CLOTHING SWAP
Sat Feb 25 3pm - 6pm
FREE ADMISSION / ALL AGES WELCOME
HOW DOES IT WORK?
BRING a bag of clean clothes, shoes & or accessories you no longer wear.
SWAP for something you want & reduce your carbon footprint!
ITEMS MUST BE:
- clean & in good condition
- ripped jeans are ok ;)
- all ages & sizes are welcome
PLEAS DON'T BRING:
- underwear, dirty/stained/damaged clothing please! Merci!
REMAINING ITEMS WILL BE DONATED TO LOCAL SHELTERS.
Please donate a non-perishable food item for the Ottawa Food Bank!
DJ SKA JEFF & DJ FELIX WILL BE SPINNING TUNES!
A New Year, A New Hope & A New Issue of TARG ZINE
INSIDE ISSUE #34
So many amazing shows & events this month at TARG - the January Wizard Picks will help guide you, Felix reviews a recording by Santa Rosa California punk band ACRYLICS, Monty gives us some IRON MAN Multiball tips in his latest MASTER CLASS, Breaking News about a Perogi experiment we are conducting in January, Curtis has a new side splitting ADVENTURES OF TARG Comic, SLO’ TOM “ helps" some zine readers with Hot Dog, Anxiety & Financial problems in his Advice Column, Star Wars, M*A*S*H, Batman & Friday The 13th are all featured in the hilarious TOYS R JOSH comic. Ever wonder how Princess Leia did that wicked hairdo? Well we teach you how - STEP BY STEP, get to know the gals in Montreal’s PALE LIPS better by checking out their exclusive TARG ZINE interview, SKA JEFF has compiled a list of CRUCIAL 613 recordings released in 2016 (and we have link to all the music so you can check it out), BIG BERN gives us the scoop on a tough game from his youth in the VIDEO GAME SUPERGUIDE, Wizard Jennilee illustrated some adorable perogies for you to colour, PETR MAUR caught Ottawa Punk band GOAT on camera for the TARG PIN-UP & of course everything you need to know about this months solid line-up of shows can be found in YOGI’s PEROGRAM. Grab yer copy at the ARCADE or
DOWNLOAD THE PDF HERE
SKA JEFF's CRUCIAL 2016 613 PICKS
Every year I make a list of amazing music released by local bands, groups and artists. There was a lot of great music released this year in Ottawa. So here it is! A list of some amazing stuff that came out in 2016, loosely stuffed into 3 genres so you can get at what you need to get inspired for the new year.
ISSUE #33 OF TARG ZINE - YOUR GUIDE TO QUALITY HOLIDAY HANGS AT THE ARCADE
INSIDE THE DEC ISSUE OF TARG ZINE: Monty delivers another MASTER CLASS with everything you need to know about the Multiball modes in one of the best pins ever made... METALLICA PINBALL, the results are in from our last Monthly Free Pinball tournament - checkout Ottawa’s top ballers for November, Skrew the Mall - get it done at the Arcade - we have some holiday shopping tips for ya, you will “Die Hard Laughing” while reading Curtis’ Adventures of TARG Comic, SLO’ TOM shares some of his personal Yuletide traditions… yep they are bizarre, James T Kirk, Batman, Superman and a new face from ROGUE ONE make appearances in Josh’s hilarious TOYS R JOSH comic, 2016 wasn’t the greatest year of all time but we had some pretty amazing shows - so the TARG Wizards compiled a Best Of list, SKA JEFF counts down his 5 fave xmas Rap Songs so you can sweeten up your holiday playlist, Professor Bernie gives us the straight goods on SPACE INVADERS in his Video Game Super Guide, Elixer Wizard Jennilee gives us the last colouring page of 2016, the Dec pin-up features an entertainer we guarantee you have never heard of (but that will all change after our Season’s Beatings Xmas Parties this month) and finally everything you need to know about the amazing #TARGHolidayHangs can be found in Yogi’s Perogram. Grab one at the Arcade or....
DOWNLOAD TARG ZINE HERE
CANADA's COOLEST: A brief rundown of everyone's fave cancon garage-punk hitmakers.
SURFS UP & SO IS ISSUE #32 OF TARG ZINE
This months front cover features a groovy illustration by Marc Audet (Rocket57.com) taken from the 2016 SURF & TURF Gig poster. Surf & Turf is an annual 2 nite Surf, Garage Rock, Instro Festival expertly curated by THE Shanker & Jeff Welch. This year we welcome bands from Vermont, Kingston, Ottawa + Toronto Garage Legends THE LEATHER UPPERS - Nov 11 & 12 at TARG.
INSIDE THE NOVEMBER ISSUE OF TARG ZINE:
November is GO time for the Mustaches For Kids dudes - learn about their recent good deeds & stash farming plans, Felix the millennial graciously lends us a killer record review from his CRINK Zine. Reading Monty’s Master Class will make you a better pinball player - this month strategies for KISS are discussed, Professor Bernie has some tips & tricks for GAUNTLET in his Superguide, Curtis pulls at your heart strings and whacks yer funny bone with his Adventures of TARG Comic, SLO’ TOM has some expert relationship & fast-food advice. Did you know some of Josh’s action figures are on Tinder now? Find out how that goes in the Toys R Josh comix, Mr. Wiggles is featured in “METAL UP YOU CATS” - find out who his daddy is by reading Val Halla’s monthly column, You won’t be DISappointed SKA JEFF Hi-Fives list this month, Ottawa music legend Patrick Shanks gives us a rundown of everyones fave Cancon Garage-Punk Hitmakers in his article “Canada’s Coolest”. Need some new music in your life? Check out the Wizard Music Chart to see what the TARG staff has been listening to recently PLUS everything you need to know about the November events at TARG can be found in Yogi’s Perogram. Drop by the Arcade or Download issue #31 of TARG Zine here.
GAME OVER: The October Halloween Edition of TARG Zine is DEAD simple to Download or EXHUME from the Arcade.
Inside Issue #31:
Halloween is a big deal for the Wizards at TARG and we have 6 events planned this month to help you celebrate - read all about it. We have some great news to share about our Beaus’s Oktoberfest fund raising efforts for Ottawa Rock Camp for Girls & For Pivots Sake, CRINKmeister FELIX has another underground punk/hardcore record review for you, MONTY’s MASTERCLASS is your source for Pinball strategies & tips - World Cup Soccer 94 is covered this month, just in time to get you into shape for our monthly FREE PINBALL TOURNAMENT on Wed Oct 19. Professor Bernie shares his thoughts about the wild dirt track racing game Super Off-Road, Curtis has some Tips & Tricks for the best Tricks & Treats, SLO’ TOM covers your quandaries about camping, used clothing & conspiracies in his advice column, TOYS R JOSH features some monstrous scenarios with his spookiest action figures… it will leave you in stitches. VAL HALLA is back with another “ Metal Up Your Cats”. We get to meet Nella & Timo, two furry little buddies that live a certain Metal drummer from Toronto. Ska Jeff counts down his 5 fave Slasher films in his Hi-FIVES Column, Learn some fun facts about Bryan. he’s one half of the Minnesota dance pop dup KOO KOO KANGA ROO, to get you prepped for the Mega Fun Family Hyper Dance Party taking place at TARG on Mon Oct 17, Wizard Elixir Jennilee has a highly unusual amphibious masked wizard for you to colour, Canadian troubadour B.A. Johnston shares the spotlight with Arcade Helper Monkey in the Oct Pin-Up PLUS everything you need to know about the amazing shows & events taking place at TARG this month can be found the PEROGRAM pages. Drop by the Arcade or Download issue #31 of TARG Zine here.